The guy that I've loved for a year...

Wow. I think I'm shocked. I don't know what else to do...so I thought I'd make a post. There's this guy: Mat, I've liked him so much for over a year now... So so very much. He's the only guy friend I've trusted with telling him about my anorexia, he's helps so much, I just love him. He's such a great person, I love being with him, we're great friends. He never knew that I liked him. I was the only person that he told who he really liked to, he's loved one of my close friends for years (Jen). They're best friends, and have been for so long. I tried so hard to not care about him. I tried so much, but no matter how many flaws I found it didn't matter, I still liked him all the more for it. I can't help it. Today I was hanging out with Jen, and she told me that she really liked Mat. They both like each other, and they're perfect for one another.... So I told her that he felt the same way and that they should talk to each other about it. So, she said they were going to get together tonight for dinner and talk about their feelings. As much as I like him, as much as it hurts.......I am so happy for them! I am so excited. I want them to be together, because I know how happy that will make him, and I really want him to be happy. Which is so weird. How can I feel both terrible and wonderful about something like this? It doesn't make any sense.